Wednesday 23 March 2023
I met my friend Fiona in Hastings yesterday. It was very windy and rained most of the day, the kind of misty clouds of rain that make you far wetter than you expect. I had somehow convinced myself that that kind of weather is just in Scotland. I am at risk of rose-tinting the weather in southeast England.
It was interesting for me going to Hastings again as that was where Chris and I originally looked at houses. Hastings is Chris’s home town and I have been visiting since I was a baby. I thought a bit about how it might feel if we lived there rather than in the middle of nowhere in Scotland. It would, I am sure, have been a positive move. I would have seen Fiona and other local friends fairly regularly and easily, gone to London more often, walked along the seafront most days, visited favourite cafes and shops … it struck me that it would have been an extension of the life Chris and I lived before we partially moved out of London. Not a major change. I think we needed somewhere completely new.
It was great to see Fiona. We have chatted on Zoom and regularly message each other, but nothing is as good and comforting as seeing friends in real life and sharing experiences, even if those experiences involve getting drenched while having a coffee and having to carry sodden rugs and shopping in perilously wet paper bags.
However, thanks to the fact that most people seem to love Scotland, it’s not proving at all difficult trying to get friends to visit us in Scotland. Most of my/our friends for the past few years (decades, in some cases) I have only really seen for a few hours here and there, quick hellos around train stations, for example when people have passed through London, and a lunch or dinner. Spending time with friends for a few days and nights gives you all time to unwind a bit, none of you checking the time for transport home.
I say all this but I think I’m a bit rose-tinted about how often I do actually see friends these days. Two friends who live in walking distance, I regularly see, I have another local friend I occasionally see and my cousin and a few friends within a few miles away (but a few miles in London is significantly different to a few miles in Scottish Borders). I used to have a lot more friends living close by in London, I suspect I rose-tint how much more I see of friends down here than up there. Maybe I only have a busy social life for the weeks I’m back in London because I make plans knowing it’s nowhere near this straightforward when I am in Scotland. There’s a lot of rose-tinting going on today, though I will be seeing my cousin and two other friends this afternoon.
This has been a very rambly post with no clear direction. I think that all it has done is confirmed that it is easier to socialise in/from London – this is no revelation – and that it will be good and different to spend longer chunks of time with friends who come up and stay in Scotland – this is also no revelation – and that it rains and is windy in East Sussex as well as Scottish Borders – again, nothing revelatory.
